Curtain Calls

In a few more days, 2008 will have his curtain call. Much has happened this year that I don’t know where to start writing. More so, much has happened in the past few months and days that I’m having difficulty re-tracking them in detail for me to have them written. Bottom line and the most important, I am still at peace. Even if there are things which should have caused me worries, I still find a way to compose myself and take things slowly. Thanks God I am seeing direction and smelling positive energies again!

It has been months when I lost a dear friend. The reason was still unknown to me… there’s just this morning when the person sent me the message of valediction. I was hurt. I felt betrayed but who am I to demand? To this person I am just a mere presence, nothing else. While I have thought that ours is a friendship that’s bound to lifetime, it was simply not. It is a cliché to hear that people will just come in and go out of our lives and this I should have learned by heart. In any relationship, no matter how hard you try to invest your whole self and your time if the other person is not really cooperating, then the best option is to let go. It could be affirmed that at some point, you will realize that you have done too much for someone already and the next possible step is to simply leave them alone. And with that, I rest my case. Let’s live and let live from now on…

Speaking about friendship, I had a discussion with my friends in the office one night during our break time. The topic was the wedding of a former colleague and amongst our group in the lunch table, I was the only one who’s invited for the affair. It was because amongst us I was the closest to this former colleague (and the truth is, we really consider each other as friends that is why I was even tapped to be the wedding reception host). I need not emphasize that both parties do not go well personally.

Now going back to the discussion, it varied from just curious questions as to who made the gown, the invite, the usual stuff until it went to the usual chants of complaints and sarcasms about the former college. Somewhere in the middle of the discussion and maybe out of defiance to the one-sided travesty, I blurted out “I consider J---- a friend because I am not choosy” to which I got a retort “You should… coz if not, they are not really friends to you but merely acquaintances”.

It brought me thinking ~ was I really friend-oriented or was my criteria of friendship too shallow? That maybe the why I lost the friend I mentioned earlier. Up to now, I don’t have the clearest perception but I will still stick to my premise that I do not choose friends as long as I can find a starting point to link myself with the other person ~ be it likes, dislikes and the more complex, ideologies; whether professionally or personally. In this world were many things are too de-humanized, I think it still pays to understand the other party and compromise ~ not just because ethics calls for it or professionalism is the game ~ but because we need to find that connection to these people around us that in some way or the other, whether we like it or not, will impact our existence. It is sure easier to cast our personal biases off than close our doors in the possibilities of gaining friends and allies, not just acquaintances.

Now, let’s stop being too philosophical.

As I have said, I will be the wedding reception host. It would be my second time to host a wedding reception and I am still learning the ins and the outs. I have hosted many events before but weddings are really special. What made it even more special to me is because I am doing it for a friend who I’ve seen hurting and hoping for a sunnier romance. It is a sure delight to partake in the beginning of her new life with her hubby ~ a journey towards building a lifetime of togetherness. I need not say how excited and optimistic I am that this union will last forever.

To this friend of mine, I wish only the best. I am now seeing how this new love has transformed her, and more than anything else, now is the time for her to be happy and contented. As to me, this wedding has reinforced to me the idea of making a career out of hosting. I promise that I’ll do good on Saturday and leave an impression to the guests. They shall be my first market. A few sidelines aren’t bad at all!

And let’s put the anecdote about friends in its superlative form. I had a wonderful time with my good T friends last December 26. It was unfortunate that Iyen was out due to I-don’t-know-why. We had our lunch and the planned exchanges of gifts. I picked out Laila and she got the “shining shimmering” lotion I bought from The Body Shop. Technically, I am an outsider to the Club T but investments really pay… I am reaping the connections I made to each of them when we were younger. But yes, I am not taking the credits alone. I will forever be grateful that these girls accepted me and my being without biases (here goes the word again!) despite the fact that I will fall short in their “T” category. And that is also because we have passed over the “for-girls-only” criteria on membership to this troupe since three of them now have husbands who we also tag along during our dates. Of course as if I will miss, they now have me as an honorary (and “paying”) member ~ and mind you, the membership fee is too expensive!

And yes with them I am talking about friends I can keep for this lifetime. The kind of friendship that I'm sure will not have curtain calls!