Two months ago when I accompanied Grace in National Bookstore when she’s to buy special papers for our Project’s Green Star initiative (the mechanics of which I can’t easily discuss on this entry). As she was looking for the best material and yes, best buy, I roamed around the bookstore to basically have nothing as I am not really a book aficionado. It was then that I chanced upon this book titled “Mingaw”. It tells the story of a married couple’s cyber sex encounters as they were separated by distance since the husband is working in Korea, as the synopsis suggested. The book caught my attention as it has this bold notice, “Paalaala: Maselang Babasahin”. And yes, as I browsed thru some of the pages, I read some explicit blow-by-blow account of their “cyber-sexing”. And I really mean explicit, mind you.
Intrigued, I bought a copy of the book. As I was about to pay in the counter, I saw another book titled “One Night Stand”. I found out this new book was published by the very same publisher who published “Mingaw”, but they were of different authors. One Night Stand intrigued me as well as this one’s a story of a university girl who accounted all her sexcapades while pursuing her degree. And so going home I had two new books to read, with Grace laughing on me as I showed her these two tomes.
The books were about 100-150 pages only, just like any Tagalog romance pocketbooks which are sold three-in-a-hundred-pesos. And yes, it was written in Tagalog and like what I’ve said, words are very vulgar. You can find (and sorry for mentioning) the words “kantutan”,”titi”, “puke” amongst others unashamedly written as if the writers were just doing their inhale-exhale exercises. Honestly, you can finish one book for an hour (even less). I wouldn’t be a hypocrite, some parts of the book were lust-provoking… but a cold shower is enough to kill the heat inside hehehe (at least for me!). As expected, I finished the two books as fast as eating my big pack of Ruffles chip.
I brought the books in the office and discreetly encouraged my friends Ryan and Grace to read them. Little did I know that the discreet encouragement will become an office craze, with the books landing from one reader’s palm to another. Are we becoming perverts? Definitely not! We just wanted to be entertained with our sometimes boring office routines.
The question now is: What has the books taught us (or me to be safe in this claim)?
It’s not just about the ways as to how a distanced couple will satisfy their sexual cravings. It’s not simply a story of a girl who’s addicted to the sexual attention all men in her university are giving her.
There are more to the yearnings and desires one would feel while reading the books. There are many sexual philosophies that are artistically imparted by the writers which can ignite your ways of thinking about sex and the facts that goes with it.
I remembered my Psyche classes before when we always hear Freud’s most famous teaching, “Man is a sexual being”. With this as part of our daily class’ prayer (joke!), my classmates and I realized all the hypocrisies our conservative society has masked ourselves when coitus is the subject. It’s a big no-no and should not be discussed publicly. By doing so, we have been more curious about the ins and the outs of coitus interactus, much to the dismay of our morally-upright Moms and Dads. Let’s face it, our sex education was all about the birds and the bees back then, with our teachers explaining this carnal pleasure the most scientific way they could. As an effect, we searched for the most realistic and logical (and practical) means and explanations of knowing this interesting subject matter. We independently made our ways to know how orgasms are reached, what’s the best and most gratifying sexual positions are and sadly, we gained wrong beliefs and notions about sex per se.
I also remembered how my team had a hard time defending our thesis back in college. We were four in the group and were composed of curious yet inexperienced graduating students (Yes, I claim that we were virgins back then!). Our topic: Sexual Awakening of Fourth Year High School Students. How we effectively handled the grueling interrogation of our panelists is now very vague with me but I have my take-away from that experience and from the thesis itself which will forever linger on me; thanks to our very supportive and accommodating respondents. The learning, expressed in a simple equation is… curiosity + proper guidance = sexual wisdom.
Before any vilification and censure be given unto me (and I’m praying there wouldn’t really be any), I would just like to clarify something: I am not blaming our conservative society with the degradation of our morals and values. I also wouldn’t blame the youths of today (and adults like me) for taking this topic as if it’s a just another normal ritual in our daily existence, just like the way we wake up, bathe, eat and lastly, sleep. I still believe that it is right and most proper to discuss sex as sacred as it should be. I am still a supporter of a morally-upright society that all of us are wanting to attain. But, and there’s a big but; we can’t simply deny ourselves of the verities as to how we existed and that is, a man and a woman sexed with one another.
The books “Mingaw” and “One Night Stand” have many sexual ideologies which if I am to include in this entry you my readers would already complain because this would be lengthy. It’s up to you to check these books in the National Bookstore or in anywhere that they’re available. If you want to borrow the books from me, let me know as we need to schedule your turn; my friends are still feasting on them!
Oops before I forget, there are sequels. There’s LnaL and Foursome. And you got it right, I have these two new books. Finished reading them, actually. Now who’s the first borrower?
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Someone's saying his goodbye...
We all know that the hardest thing to do is to say goodbye to the things that has been a vital part of our existence. In every alpha, there’s always an omega ~ a song will have its last note, performance its finale and yes, birth its death. Sadly, we have to accept that this is the cycle of life. No matter how hard we evade it, we just need to be with the flow. And even how unwilling we are, we simply needed to let go.
In every goodbye that we utter, rivers of tears will definitely follow. That’s human nature. We simply get affected by a sad love song, by a flashback of a good memory and by the very sight of where we have been to for most of our happy times. That’s the phase we have to endure and sure enough, time will heal the wounds of these bitter yesterdays. It is not easy but definitely, it’s worth the ride. And yes, after being in the most horrible state of being hurt, we will slowly move and go on. In the process of being torn, we’ll be reformed and become a more polished person.
I should have done this a long long time ago, but only now that I have gathered much strength…
Yes, I am saying goodbye. Much has been said and done. Many lies has been spoken, many alibis I have accepted blindly. I got tired of being us... for I simply know that since the very beginning it’s more of me alone. I got tired of being there… for I know that to you I’m just a mere presence. I got tired of you… for I know you’re not the one I really deserve.
Yes, I am saying goodbye… and with this goodbye I wish to find the solitude I have longed for…
Goodbye…
In every goodbye that we utter, rivers of tears will definitely follow. That’s human nature. We simply get affected by a sad love song, by a flashback of a good memory and by the very sight of where we have been to for most of our happy times. That’s the phase we have to endure and sure enough, time will heal the wounds of these bitter yesterdays. It is not easy but definitely, it’s worth the ride. And yes, after being in the most horrible state of being hurt, we will slowly move and go on. In the process of being torn, we’ll be reformed and become a more polished person.
I should have done this a long long time ago, but only now that I have gathered much strength…
Yes, I am saying goodbye. Much has been said and done. Many lies has been spoken, many alibis I have accepted blindly. I got tired of being us... for I simply know that since the very beginning it’s more of me alone. I got tired of being there… for I know that to you I’m just a mere presence. I got tired of you… for I know you’re not the one I really deserve.
Yes, I am saying goodbye… and with this goodbye I wish to find the solitude I have longed for…
Goodbye…
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Be a Believer to be an Achiever
Written by Harvey Mackay
The professor stood before his class of 30 senior molecular biology students, about to pass out the final exam. 'I have been privileged to be your instructor this semester, and I know how hard you have all worked to prepare for this test. I also know most of you are off to medical school or grad school next fall,' he said to them.
'I am well aware of how much pressure you are under to keep your GPAs up, and because I know you are all capable of understanding this material, I am prepared to offer an automatic 'B' to anyone who would prefer not to take the final.'
The relief was audible as a number of students jumped up to thank the professor and departed from class. The professor looked at the handful of students who remained, and offered again, 'Any other takers? This is your last opportunity.' One more student decided to go.
Seven students remained. The professor closed the door and took attendance. Then he handed out the final exam. There were two sentences typed on the paper:
'Congratulations, you have just received an 'A' in this class. Keep believing in yourself.'
I never had a professor who gave a test like that. It may seem like the easy way out of grading a bunch of exams, but it's a test that any teacher in any discipline could and should give. Students who don't have confidence in what they've learned are 'B' students at best.
The same is true for students of real life. The 'A' students are those who believe in what they're doing because they've learned from both successes and failures. They've absorbed life's lessons, whether from formal education or the school of hard knocks, and become better people.
Those are the people who you look for when you're hiring or promoting, and the ones you keep if you're downsizing. Your organisation needs their brand of thinking.
Psychologists say that by the age of two, 50 percent of what we ever believe about ourselves has been formed; by age six, 60 percent, and at eight years, 80 percent. Wouldn't you love to have the energy and optimism of a little kid? There is nothing you couldn't do or learn or be.
But you're a big kid now, and you realise you have some limits. Don't let the biggest limit be yourself. Take your cue from Sir Edmund Hillary, the first person to reach the summit of Mount Everest: 'It's not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.'
Believing in yourself comes from knowing what you are really capable of doing. When it's your turn to step up to the plate, realise that you won't hit a homerun every time. Baseball superstar Mickey Mantle struck out more than 1,700 times, but it didn't stop him from excelling at baseball. He believed in himself, and he knew his fans believed in him.
Surround yourself with positive people - they know the importance of confidence and will help you keep focused on what you can do instead of what you can't. Who you surround yourself with is who you become.
Never stop learning! I would work this advice into every column if I could; it's that important. Don't limit yourself only to work-related classes, either. Learn everything about every subject that you can. When you know what you're talking about, it shows.
Be very careful not to confuse confidence with a big ego. If you want people to believe in you, you also have to believe in them. Understand well that those around you also have much to contribute, and they deserve your support. Without faith in yourself and others, success is impossible.
At the end of a particularly frustrating practice one-day, a football coach dismissed his players by yelling, 'Now all you idiots, go take a shower!' All but one player headed toward the locker room. The coach glared at him and asked why he was still there.
'You told all the idiots to go, Sir,' the player replied, 'and there sure seems to be a lot of them. But I am not an idiot.'
Confident? You bet. And smart enough to coach that team some day.
The professor stood before his class of 30 senior molecular biology students, about to pass out the final exam. 'I have been privileged to be your instructor this semester, and I know how hard you have all worked to prepare for this test. I also know most of you are off to medical school or grad school next fall,' he said to them.
'I am well aware of how much pressure you are under to keep your GPAs up, and because I know you are all capable of understanding this material, I am prepared to offer an automatic 'B' to anyone who would prefer not to take the final.'
The relief was audible as a number of students jumped up to thank the professor and departed from class. The professor looked at the handful of students who remained, and offered again, 'Any other takers? This is your last opportunity.' One more student decided to go.
Seven students remained. The professor closed the door and took attendance. Then he handed out the final exam. There were two sentences typed on the paper:
'Congratulations, you have just received an 'A' in this class. Keep believing in yourself.'
I never had a professor who gave a test like that. It may seem like the easy way out of grading a bunch of exams, but it's a test that any teacher in any discipline could and should give. Students who don't have confidence in what they've learned are 'B' students at best.
The same is true for students of real life. The 'A' students are those who believe in what they're doing because they've learned from both successes and failures. They've absorbed life's lessons, whether from formal education or the school of hard knocks, and become better people.
Those are the people who you look for when you're hiring or promoting, and the ones you keep if you're downsizing. Your organisation needs their brand of thinking.
Psychologists say that by the age of two, 50 percent of what we ever believe about ourselves has been formed; by age six, 60 percent, and at eight years, 80 percent. Wouldn't you love to have the energy and optimism of a little kid? There is nothing you couldn't do or learn or be.
But you're a big kid now, and you realise you have some limits. Don't let the biggest limit be yourself. Take your cue from Sir Edmund Hillary, the first person to reach the summit of Mount Everest: 'It's not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.'
Believing in yourself comes from knowing what you are really capable of doing. When it's your turn to step up to the plate, realise that you won't hit a homerun every time. Baseball superstar Mickey Mantle struck out more than 1,700 times, but it didn't stop him from excelling at baseball. He believed in himself, and he knew his fans believed in him.
Surround yourself with positive people - they know the importance of confidence and will help you keep focused on what you can do instead of what you can't. Who you surround yourself with is who you become.
Never stop learning! I would work this advice into every column if I could; it's that important. Don't limit yourself only to work-related classes, either. Learn everything about every subject that you can. When you know what you're talking about, it shows.
Be very careful not to confuse confidence with a big ego. If you want people to believe in you, you also have to believe in them. Understand well that those around you also have much to contribute, and they deserve your support. Without faith in yourself and others, success is impossible.
At the end of a particularly frustrating practice one-day, a football coach dismissed his players by yelling, 'Now all you idiots, go take a shower!' All but one player headed toward the locker room. The coach glared at him and asked why he was still there.
'You told all the idiots to go, Sir,' the player replied, 'and there sure seems to be a lot of them. But I am not an idiot.'
Confident? You bet. And smart enough to coach that team some day.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Of Night Shifts, Disappointments, Hopes and Excitements...
I missed writing. Been so busy lately that I put my pen aside, and whenever I got some spare time I would just take some naps and/or stay at the comfort of my own room. I also missed my sanctuary (I call my room my “holy place”) and I just realized last night that I've been using the same bed sheet, pillow cases and blanket for three months already. Whew... it explained that bad odor I usually smell during sleep time.
I am currently on the night shift since April 28. No choice, I had to take my turn on this cycle so as to be fair with my team member, Ever. While I am tired of it, night shift schedule is still okay with me. I feel more productive during the night since there are minimal distractions. I don't know but even if I have only a few hours of sleep I am still energized. And thanks to the schedule, I got to see who Ryan's current apple of the eye is!
I also missed doing many of my activities that are usually done in the evening. I simply can't reverse them for the day... they are still best done at night time. What are those? Hmm... dinners, texting till midnight, chatting with friends, etc. etc. I have a new text mate (J) but sadly, we never had some good time texting yet. Perhaps when I transition back to the day shift, fingers crossed!
Dad has been hospitalized for three days... and yes, it left me penniless hehehe... Had to worry for my shop's internet payment for I used the money in paying the hospital bill. Can't wait for the next payout, though I know nothing will be left for me again. It was disappointing that someone did not reply on my text message asking if I could borrow some extra cash. But that was okay, it only showed that I can't rely on that person.
Went to Subic last May 2 and 3, my team had our Team Building Activity in Playa Papagayo. Not really a fascinating site, but at least I was able to rest. My goddaughter Elaine celebrated her 1st birthday last March 4 but I was not able to participate much in the fun, experienced a terrible toothache. Perhaps my teeth were moving brought about my braces!
I also got disappointed with the low turn-outs on our project's activity on May 18 but I am okay now. I realized there are things which are really not interesting for some of our folks in the office.
Excited about our Movie Night on May 26. We'll watch Indiana Jones in Glorietta 4 and again, Blocked Screening. It was unfortunate that Greenbelt Cinemas can't accommodate us anymore on our preferred date, but that was okay. At least, we will be able to bring someone along... Hmm, my colleagues are now excited as to who I shall bring with me... Someone is getting popular in the office lately that I am always put on the spot. Hehehe, sadly, I won't invite that person.
Another school year is just around the corner. I smell expenses again... Ejay's school stuff. Dear Lord help me!
And lastly, can't wait for June... why? Well, will be back to normal work schedule... and hopefully, normal activities again...
Good day everyone!!!
I'm tired...
Of working but I simply can't leave my job... I need it to sustain my needs and my lifestyle of course!
Of working the night shift as I am not able to do my activities every evening... but I know that graveyard shifts are part of my job
Of missing B--- and I hate being ignored
Of stalking B--- as again, I am just ignored
Of hearing the same reasons from A for I know these are just lame excuses
Of our 30-minute encounters for I deserve more time and attention
Of playing around so I may feel wanted and needed
Of hating other people even if they didn't do anything against me.
Of being jealous for no reasons at all
Of sending J my text messages without any replies
Of waiting for G and B to accept my Friendster invite
Of having more stress than I really deserve
Of longing...
Of wanting...
and of being there when someone needs me... but when the time comes that I'm the one in need, nobody's around!
Bullshit!!! Life is really unfair!
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